My circumcision journal (Updated with picture and advice)
Warning: Read at your own risk. If you are not comfortable with the content of this journal, you are free to leave.
Years back, I found out the foreskin of my penis (a.k.a. little brother) was not able to retract below the head. After consulting my brother, who is a doctor, I was suspected of having phimosis, a condition where male foreskin cannot be fully retracted from the head. So we proceed to a friend of his, who’s a surgeon, to confirm my condition. As expected, it turned out that I had phimosis. The opening of my foreskin was too small (not as small as the one here lar) in that I couldn’t retract it .
Phimosis is a risk factor of penile cancer. Those with phimosis are usually unable to clean their penises well.
So, there is one solution: circumcision! If you are not sure what that is, ask your male Muslim friends, or read the link. If you are still unsure, get a gun, and shoot on your head. I mean your upper head, not the one down under!
Due to work commitment, I was not able to undergo a circumcision because it would take weeks to heal. So I postpone the treatment until last Tuesday.
Day 1 (Tuesday)
8.00am – Reached hospital. Waited in the Minor Surgery queue.
9.00am – Thanks to my brother who registered me through back-door. I had to re-register myself, and waited longer than I should. Still, thank him for the arrangement.
10.30am – Nurse called my name. I entered the room and changed my clothes to patient gown (for the first time). One of the two surgeons handed me an agreement to sign before I (was) cut chopped underwent surgery. Next thing I know when I lied on the surgical bed, my gown was slowly and partially removed by male and female nurses. Yes, female nurses!
They put an L-bar in the middle of the surgical bed, and put part of my gown on it to prevent me from witnessing the surgery. I was a bit pissed for not being allowed to watch the surgery (because I actually thought of recording it). The surgeon said I wasn’t supposed to watch it (to prevent me from being panic). Feeling disappointed, I rested my head on the pillow and started letting my little brother be harassed by aliens.
Just when the doctor wanted to start, my cell phone rang. The surgeon brought the phone to me, and it was my brother who called. “Where are you?” my brother asked. “I am lying on the bed and waiting to be cut. If you wanna be cut too, then come over.” I answered. Everyone laughed.
The surgeons started cleaning my lower body. They did some examination on my little brother, and confirmed that I had phimosis.
Then, the nightmare began. They performed local anaesthetic on my little brother, by injecting 4-6 injections. Oh my, my little brother was screaming in pain! The pain was excruciating! I had never felt that pain in my life! Imagine that! 4-6 injections! I couldn’t even recall the exact number of injections because it was so painful!
The surgeon waited for a while, and then started poking my genital with a needle (stop laughing!). He wanted to confirm that my genital was numbed. First few pokes, I could feel that something sharp was on my little brother, be it pin-point pain, or just feeling a touch. Then I started to have no feeling. Yeah, I didn’t feel anything touching my little brother.
The almighty surgery began!
Throughout the entire surgery, I felt nothing at all. That was the first time I felt empty below me. I felt like a girl. I didn’t know when my foreskin was cut, when my little brother was stitched. Occasionally I felt asleep on the bed (the day before that couldn’t sleep lar!).
The surgery lasted for about 40-45 minutes until it came to an end. Then I saw the female nurses started harassing cleaning my little brother. I was thinking, we need more male nurses in the hospital. Definitely!
When I got down from the bed, I still had not seen how was my little brother yet. It was when I changed my clothes, I saw it was wrapped with gauze and with blood. Oh my, period! I am a girl now!
11.30am – I waited for my brother. We went out for lunch and then he fetched me home. I wasn’t feeling any pain at all, which was strange.
1.00pm – I removed the gauze, and it started bleeding. The blood was dripping non-stop for like 3-5 minutes. I was a bit freaked out, but I consoled myself that it was just a monthly menstrual cycle. I didn’t have any gauze with me, so I just wrapped it with tissue after that.
3.00pm – I was working on Qhuen, and then I felt something was wet underneath me. To my surprise, the white tissue became red, and below it was a pool (exaggeration) of blood. No problem lar, period mar.
I feel like a girl for the rest of the day.
Day 2 (Wednesday)
Couldn’t sleep the whole night. Erection during sleep caused me pain, pain and pain! My brother was like a mummy, so tight that it should not have any erection.
I knew I had to filter all visual entertainment from now.
I peed (peeing was totally fine after circumcision) every night before I sleep, but it still erected.
Day 3 (Thursday)
I was very much disturbed by the stitches on my wound. They were extremely poky and sharp. It just kept poking my left and right thigh. I had to walk with my legs opened wide.
Day 4 (Friday)
I wrapped it with gauze before I slept to prevent the suture from poking my thighs. It helped.
Day 5 (Saturday)
Now it wasn’t just about suture. I started feeling the pain on the wound.
Day 6 (Sunday)
Suture and erection.
Day 7 (Monday)
Erection and suture. Trust me, it’s all about these two things that I hate post-circumcision.
Day 8 (Tuesday)
Suture and erection. Now I wrapped it with gauze when I sleep at night because I hate the poking feeling the suture is making. Or, use some cloth to cover your thigh to prevent it from being poked.
Day 9 (Wednesday)
What else could I expect?
Day 10 (Thursday)
Today had been massive. I had a meeting in Cyberjaya at 9.30am. So I got up early to get ready. This would be my first time going out (more than just buying lunch/dinner) after 9 days. I mummied my little brother with gauze, leaving the head slightly out so that I could pee.
When I peed the first time, I noticed that I couldn’t actually prevent the urine from wetting my gauze. Oh gosh, it’s so filthy! Now that my pants (around the zip area), gauze and even my belt, were wet. What to do? I couldn’t change it because I did not bring extra gauze. So I had to bear with it.
Then about 9pm, I went home after having dinner with my sister-in-law, my friend called me up for a drink. So I had to rush to remove my wet gauze and change a new dressing. Just as I tried to pull the gauze out, I found that the gauze was sticked to my wound! The urine dissolved the blood cloak and resulted in sticking the gauze. My friend was already waiting to pick me up outside. I had no choice, but to just peel it off… Awww… That was painful!
Funnily, the girls whom I went out with, could still laugh at me when I explained to them what happened.
After the yumcha session, I went home and found that it was sticking again. This time I wet the gauze and my little brother with water, and peel it off slowly. So that’s how it should be.
Day 11 (Friday)
Today had to go out for cell group with my brother. So I wrapped my little brother with gauze again. When I went home after that, I found that the wound was reopened. Only then I knew that when I move too much even though with gauze, it would compressed the wound and bleed again.
Day 12 (Saturday)
Went to Kajang today. Same thing happened to the past two days. I just tried to avoid urinating. The first thing I did after coming back from Kajang was to rush to the toilet and let some juice out. Ahem, I mean, unwanted urine in my body.
Day 13 (Sunday)
Remove your gauze when you really need to pee. That’s the advice I could give.
My brother was telling me the other day that he met the surgeon who did the circumcision for me. Apparently, he used a hard suture on my wound, but then it was too difficult to use, then he switched to a soft one. I was thinking, heck, why didn’t he use the soft one in the first place? Didn’t he know the misery of having something poking your little brother every now and then?
Maybe, he was not circumcised. That’s why he did not know the feelings.
Day 14 (Monday)
Things just got better. However, I found that I wasn’t having any morning erection anymore. Is this good or bad?
Day 15 (Tuesday)
Officially two weeks since my circumcision. Things got better, except that I was still waiting for my wound to heal.
Here’s a present for you guys who are curious to know how the foreskin looks like after circumcision.
Warning: Viewer’s discretion is advised! Click on the tiny thumbnail below to see it in full size.
Day 16 (Wednesday)
This is the day I went for my orthodontic treatment, where I put on braces. No updates on my little brother. Still the same.
Day 17 (Thursday)
I really hate the hard suture, that is slow in dissolving!
Day 18 (Friday)
Long day today. I went out for a movie with my little brother mummied. You just need to put on gauze every time you go out.
Day 19 (Saturday)
Went back to my hometown, Ipoh. My mum asked me to show my little brother to her. I reluctantly showed to her. And she… laughed! Very well! My mum said, what I have now is all from her. Forgot to tell you guys that my brother did the same, lured me to show my little brother to him every now and then, with the reason that he wanted to see how was its recovery.
Day 20 (Sunday)
Went to church without putting on gauze for the first time. Why? I was late, because I couldn’t sleep well the night before. There was this blood cloak that formed, peeled off half by itself. So when I was crawling on my bed, I accidentally pulled it, and if you were sleeping beside me, you would me crying in pain while my hands were holding my little brother.
In the evening, I decided to perform my own minor surgery – removing the blood cloak. First, I needed to wet it so that it would be easier to cut. At first I tried pulling it, but it was even more painful. After checking it thoroughly, only then I found out that the blood cloak was formed with the suture too! Oh my… I cut it slowly. Done!
Day 21 (Monday)
Doing fine so far. Still, sutures…
Day ? (Gooday)
Ok, I lost count. I don’t remember what day today is, after not having internet connection for a period of time. Anyway, it’s about more than 4 weeks since my circumcision, and I am not wearing any sarong anymore. I still can’t get used to the fact that my foreskin was removed, and my little brother would cry whenever anything touches it. Ok, maybe not cry (I don’t know what you are thinking now when you read that word), but it just gets sensitive and a little uncomfortable. I am not sure how long it takes to get used to, hopefully I will be fine before I get married.
I will be visiting the surgeon again in June, to do a follow-up check if my little brother is healing properly.
Pre-circumcision
Here are the things to ask/request before you perform circumcision:
- If the surgeon is a female, ask if she had any problem with her boyfriend/husband the night before. If she said she had problems, tell her you are innocent; if she said she had no problems, you are safe.
- If the surgeon is a male, assure him that your little brother is always smaller, tinier than his.
- Insist for soft suture.
- Shower before you are circumcised, because you would likely not want to shower after that.
Post-circumcision
Here are the things to do after circumcision:
- Remove gauze whenever necessary on first day. It helps to form the blood cloak.
- Stay away from hot weather. Stay in air-cond room to help forming the blood cloak.
- You can still pee.
- Pee as often as possible before you sleep. Don’t drink water before you sleep.
- Pray hard that you don’t get morning erection (for that period of recovery lar! Not forever!)
- Stop watching movie, series, drama, etc. Don’t ask me why. Just don’t watch.
- When you start to see the tails of the suture, trim them with a sharp scissor (heat it up with fire before you do this) after shower. Never trim it when it’s dry!
This post is dedicated to Mr. Sam Tan, who emailed me and said he missed my updates.
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